


The king returns

by Alyss_asleep



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Adam Parrish Loves Ronan Lynch, Adam Parrish is Bad at Feelings, Boyfriends, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Minor Henry Cheng/Richard Gansey III/Blue Sargent, Multi, Ronan Lynch Being an Asshole, Ronan Lynch Loves Adam Parrish, Ronan Lynch is a Good Boyfriend
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-17
Updated: 2019-06-17
Packaged: 2020-05-13 18:35:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,168
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19256854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alyss_asleep/pseuds/Alyss_asleep
Summary: How to navigate love and friendship.Aka, Adam has an internal freak out about Gansey's return. He bloody loves Ronan Lynch and he doesn't want to relinquish his spot as Ronan's right hand man.Ronan is a beautiful soft terror, Adam is thirsty and Gansey has a red face.





	The king returns

When Adam was uncomfortable he was still, silent, waiting. In contrast, Ronan was in constant motion, excitement leaking out of him with a thousand tiny gestures. Feet tapping, leg jiggling and fingers unable to stay still. They twisted into his leather wrist bands and then over to worry the the worn patch in the knee of Adam’s jeans, and then back and forth over and over - this was quite irritating but Adam knew better than to try and quiet Ronan’s fidgeting. Besides, despite the knowledge that Ronan was speeding the destruction of his favourite denims, he liked the warmth that spread through his skin from the point of causal contact. It was still a thrill; the easy, mindless way that Ronan would touch him. It wasn’t sexual - well, it wasn’t always sexual - just a desire for closeness and contact. Adam longed for it when he was away.

He loved college; the history that was integral to the fabric and culture of the institution, the staggering amount of knowledge to amass, the swathes of different people with varying perspectives, wants, needs, interests, loves… It was dizzying and overwhelming for someone that had been contained by the same small town for the prior 19 years of his life - but it was incredible. He wasn’t as different, as noticibly other. He felt consumed and insignificant, but it was incredibly freeing. To do what he wanted, be who he wanted, and be with whomever he wanted, but largely go unnoticed, was a kind of anonymity that he has spent his early life craving. That did not mean that Adam was not achieveing academic success; his ability and work ethic were equally admired and hated by his entire class. Rather, the boldness, strangeness, or foreignness of some of his cohorts, masked the unlikeliness that was Adam Parrish and gave him the space to live at his own pace.

Still, he dreamt of Ronan. The electrifying clarity that he only felt when Ronan’s lips, teeth, tongue, were dragging wonderful, excruciatingly potent pathways along his lips, fingers, collar bones ribs and thighs. The centering connection of calloused fingers resting against the nape of his neck, the reckless comfort of a strong arm around his shoulder and annoyance of a familiar elbow thrown jokingly into his ribs. The feeling of acceptance and togetherness and Ronan, Ronan, Ronan followed him everywhere he went. It was bolstered by phonecalls (that were always unexpected but becoming increasingly frequent), late night texts, funny emails and care packages. These were a constant source of entertainment, confusion and bewilderment for his roommate and could contain anything from dreamt mix tapes and jars of hand cream, to ancient pornographic Latin texts, unfocused photos of anything that Ronan found amusing or of interest, and vast amounts of imperishable food. These offerings were always accompanied by a hastily scribbled note - they would seem crass and insulting to any casual reader, but shouted love, love, love to the intended recipient.

When he was here - at home - the togetherness was palpable. Adam had never expected to find a place where he could belong, and was even more surprised to find it in the sprawling, magical landscape of the Barns (beside a beautiful and infuriating boy that somehow wanted him). Ronan was barely believable as a boy - a warring mash up of dreams, love and fire. A mass of reckless energy, contained in human cladding, and capable of holding life and destruction within each breath he took. It had been such a stretch to believe that this uncanny being had chosen him. And yet, he felt the truth of it in every breath he took. With each kiss that Ronan had carefully placed, along every inch of Adam’s scarred body, he had pressed trust, belief and desire right through Adam’s skin.

Now, poised on the precipice of Gansey’s return, Adam was brimming with excitement, but… he also felt a terrible rising anxiety and it was threatening to choke him.

Despite shouting about his independence, Adam could not deny that himself and Ronan had become Gansey’s men, way before they had found their own autonomy. They had been swept up by his dynamism, his affection, enthusiasm and endless drive to find more meaning. Adam had loved it, loved Gansey and loved the boy that it had allowed him to become. But, this year had changed him. He had found himself, or at least found some sense of confidence and contentment in his own being, and, in the process, had grown inextricably close to Ronan. His fear, though selfish and somewhat ridiculous, was that Gansey would upset the careful balance that he and Ronan had co-created.

It was not envy - he shared Ronan’s joy at the thought of seeing their friend, and was endlessly grateful for anything that could ignite happiness in his boyfriend’s battered heart. And, he knew that Ronan’s endless capacity to love was enormous, and could comfortably encompass a magnitude of friends and family members without taking away from the love he gave to Adam. But, their connection meant everything to Adam - it had become more important than power, money or success, it had become his touchstone - and he felt threatened.

Adam knew that he was an inherently jealous person. He wasn’t pleased about this, but it was an inescapable facet of his personality; love had not made him faultless. He had wanted so much and gone so long having nothing, that every instinct told him to use his entire being to hold on to the things that mattered most. This used to be his pride, his ambition, his intelligence - but was now Ronan, his home, his future.

Despite, or perhaps in spite, of this, Adam was not possessive. He did not want to own Ronan, or be owned by him. Adam wanted the world to see Ronan the way he did, and for Ronan to receive as much love as he gave - this was something that surpassed Adam’s reckoning; it’s extent beyond his comprehension.

Adam wanted Ronan to choose him. To come home to him. To share a life with him. He may have fallen down a mystical rabbit hole, but he did not believe in fate, or love at first sight, or soulmates. He believed in free will and the power of choosing to become someone’s partner. The knowledge that Ronan had made a measured decision to be with him (and revelled in that choice) was more magical than any ley line, or star crossed, predestined nonsense.

And yet, he knew that Gansey had so much more to offer. Money, adventure and a less complicated kind of love and friendship. Adam was still partially bound by the hate his father gave. He loved Ronan with every fibre of his being, but it was not with abandon. He was constantly watching, assessing, calculating and preparing to lose what he had. He had only survived this far in life by expecting peril and hurt at any given moment - that was not an easy thing to shake off.

Gansey could love with unwavering certainty; a belief that rivaled the powers of fate. That was what Ronan deserved. Not his halting, hesitating dismount. Ronan’s lover should have taken a headlong leap into the abyss, screaming with pleasure and exhilaration all the way down. He knew that Ronan would rationalise that they still got to the same place in the end - Adam’s path had just taken longer, exacting more control and greater care. Ronan’s obvious pleasure with their current romantic situation was enough to make Adam give thanks to every deity that he did not believe in. His own private miracle. But, his deepest and most self deprecating parts could not squash down the guilt that arose from not being able to give Ronan more.

“You’re a fucking idiot Parrish,” Ronan had railed at him the few times he had dared to being up his secret fears. “How can someone with such a hard on for smarts be so fucking stupid”? At this point the anger had fallen from his face, though it lost none of it’s intensity, and he had reached out to grasp Adam’s jaw. His grip had not been a gentle caress, it was a firm, tethering hold - just a fraction away from uncomfortable - but it was everything that Adam needed. “This,” he stated fiercely, “is everything I want. You,” he added, voice steely and unwavering, “are everything I want”. Adam had swallowed the rest of the coming sentence, and Ronan’s breath, with a fierce and passionate kiss. It had not been until much later, bodies overheated and impossibility intertwined, that Ronan had admitted, “I’d believe that I dreamt you but, you’re impossible. I wouldn’t know how.”

Adam felt known, loved, wanted and supported for the first time in his life. He did not want to give that up. He would not give Ronan up. They had cultivated their feelings in a space created between them when they were alone together, and home had become an invisible slither of reality that only existed in their togetherness. Until now, it had been impenetrable to anyone else. It was theirs and Adam coveted it. He did not think there was space to admit anyone else inside but he feared that Gansey would worm his way in, without either of them noticing, and make the space his own. Adam would share Ronan’s affection freely, his time, hugs, touches, food, thoughts and even his house, but he would not share the magic that was their connection. However, he did not want to hurt Ronan, or ostracise their most treasured friend. He did not know how he should act. Adam hated not knowing.

“Hey asshole,” Ronan nudged him hard enough to make Adam’s jaw clack together unpleasantly. “You’re thinkin’ too much. It makes you looked constipated”. Adam turned sideways to glower at his boyfriend with the all of the disapproval he could muster. His icy fortitude annoyingly diminished by his damned fondness for Ronan’s inherent Ronanness. “You certainly know how to turn on the charm,” he muttered instead.

“That sounds like sarcasm,” Ronan responded with an annoyingly delicious smirk and confidently quirked brow, “but we both know I’m getting in your pants tonight.” Adam scoffed but couldn’t stop his smile. “How do you know it won’t be me getting into your pants?” Ronan shrugged. “Does it really matter?”

There wasn’t really any comeback for that, so instead, Adam grabbed hold of Ronan’s collar and pressed a hard, searing kiss into his unexpectant mouth. “I love you best”, Adam whispered before pressing another fierce kiss onto Ronan’s pliant lips.

Ronan returned the kiss with a gentleness and love that left Adam swooning, but then pulled back and held his boyfriend firmly by the shoulders. He just looked at him for several minutes, direct and unforgiving. “You’re worried about me and Gansey?” He asked, disbelief and a little bit of hurt colouring his voice.

“I… No… Yes… Not like you think.” Adam whispered back, averting his gaze. “I know you’re not like me,” he tried to explain. “You could love an army of people and still make room for me. I know I’m the only one you want… sexually.. romantically… like a boyfriend…” He trailed off at this point no longer able to articulate his feelings.

“What’s the problem then?” Ronan asked gruffly, not trying to mask his confusion.

“I want… I want you to like me best.” Adam finally stuttered out. Voice wavering but eyes challenging and resolute.

He did not expected Ronan to laugh at him, but that was his response. Adam wanted to scream! Ronan’s laughter was often harsh, a little cruel and often manic, but it was always unflinching beautiful. He couldn’t help but be struck by it - but that didn’t mean he wasn’t getting ready to punch Ronan square in the face.

Seeing his rapidly growing annoyance and discomfort, Ronan held his hand up in a gesture of surrender. A final few snorts escaped from his nostrils and between his clamped lips as he struggled to return himself fully to the discussion.

“Parrish, you fucking numpty”. His smile was so wide it threatened to split his face. “I always like you best - even when you’re being ridiculous. Gansey is my best friend, that’s never going to change, but you’re - you are - my fucking other half. I don’t even know how to function properly without you anymore.”

“You never did,” Adam shot back to lighten the mood - always uncomfortable under the full weight of Ronan’s honesty. “When have you ever functioned effectively without a keeper? Or do I need to call Declan to get him to explain what being part of a legally abiding society means?”

Ronan just grinned, unashamed. “You good now princess? Or, do you need me to stroke your hair and whisper sweet nothings into your good ear until you feel loved”.

“Shut the fuck up asshole,” Adam grumbled back, before leaning in and brushing a soft press of lips against Ronan’s sharp cheek. Ronan could be an insuffurably smug bastard sometimes but Adam would be lying if he said it didn’t turn him on a little.

“Think we’ve got enough time too…” He asked, nodding toward the bedroom. Ronan’s grin turned feral and he shifted his weight forward, tugging Adam’s hand to propel them both up and off the couch. Unprepared for the sudden change of momentum, Adam could not keep up. His feet tangled between Ronan’s, in a bid for purchase, and the pair went crashing down onto the floor. Adam found himself lying on top of Ronan’s back, face smashed between his shoulder blades. Unwilling to waste the opportunities that life presented, Adam ran his hand down the length of Ronan’s back and stopped at his ass to enjoy a long, firm squeeze.  
“Was hopin’ for the bed but I can make the floor work,” he drawled and bit at Ronan’s exposed shoulder.

“Um hello?”

Adam thought he heard something, but there were more pressing matters to deal with. Ronan growled and reached back to pull Adam’s free hand up to his mouth. The warm, moist sensation of his tongue swiping against Adam’s rough fingers caused them both to moan.

“Oh goodness,” a voice rang out as the hand cupping Ronan’s firm ass meandered higher to pull at his belt. “Please don’t take off his pants. I’ve truly missed you both but there are some things that I genuinely do not wish to see.”

Adam jerked backwards, fingers catching against Ronan’s teeth and drawing blood. “Mother fucker,” Ronan hissed and quickly reached for Adam’s hand to assess the damage. The latter ignored it, face bright red and eyes looking anywhere but at his friend.

“How long have you been standing there?” Adam asked, tone polite but clipped. Gansey blushed furiously and stuttered out his response. “Only a few moments really, you didn’t hear me. You seemed… somewhat distracted.”

Ronan snorted and pushed himself into sitting position. Adam glanced at his boyfriend but quickly looked away when he noticed the prominent bulge straining against the fabric of his jeans. Unfortunately, he wasn’t the only one to notice - Gansey’s face was now burning with the heat of a thousand suns and his stuttering was getting out of control.

“Still a prude then,” Ronan teased with zero shame. “I thought your boy toy and The Maggot might have whipped that out of you by now.” His smirk grew at Gansey’s obvious distress over the word whipped. “They like it kinky, huh. I knew the Maggot had it in her, and Cheng definitely doesn’t go for vanilla, but I gotta say Dick, I’m impressed.”

Adam smacked Ronan’s shoulder hard with his uninjured palm and forged forward with as much dignity as he could muster.

“It’s good to see you Gans.” This time he offered genuine warmth and Gansey’s embarrassment fell away to welcome a dazzling smile.

He was on his feet now and moving to clap a hand, in a manly show of affection, against Gansey’s shoulder. Ronan snorted at this and pushed Adam’s hand aside to pull Gansey into a fierce hug. Just as quickly, he let his arms drop away and grinned wickedly in Adam’s direction. “I can’t hug you too long man. Parrish’s worried that I might like you more than him - fucking ridiculous right? So, I love you and I missed you but I’m gonna go and suck his cock until he knows I fucking like him best.”

Adam and Gansey both froze. Adam desperate for the ground to swallow him whole, and Gansey now so red that he was almost neon. Adam was furious, Ronan was often a complete dick, but he’d freaking thrown him under the bus - and he wasn’t even blushing!

“I’m sure that’s not true Adam,” Gansey was saying tactfully, his voice polite with the false brightness of a cornered politician. Ronan was still attempting to tow him toward the bedroom but Adam was rooted to the spot. What the hell was happening?! “Damn right it’s not,” Ronan agreed loudly, his hand still firmly tugging on Adam’s wrist.

“Everyone just stop.” He commanded suddenly, breaking out of his daze. “Gansey, you and I are fine, and I promise everything is good between myself and that idiot”. He motioned in Ronan’s general direction but kept his eyes on Gansey.

After a few instense seconds, when he was satisfied that he regained a modicum of control over the spiralling situation, he turned to face his boyfriend. “Lynch, I’m not going to have sex with you while Gansey stands in the hallway.”

“He can chill in the kitchen or whatever,” Ronan interjected gracelessly.

Adam pinched the bridge of his nose. “Here is what we are going to do. Gansey, you are going to go outside and come back in again. You are going to knock first. Ronan you are going to open the door and welcome our friend politely whilst I quietly die in this corner and pretend the last ten minutes didn’t happen.”

Ronan smirked but Gansey spun on his heel and set off toward the door. “Jesus, Dick. You don’t have to fucking actually leave,” Ronan called out amused. Gansey stopped and looked back and forth between his friends faces, discomfort evident. “Sit the fuck down and tell us about South America man”.

Gansey, looking relieved, dropped down into a chair and did as directed. Ronan listened, feigning disinterest and occasionally throwing small balls of screwed up paper at Gansey’s face. Adam, slowly, relaxed. This was known, familiar and wonderful in its simplicity. It was three boys talking, two of them were lovers, but they all shared love for one another. Some bonds would never be broken; friend to friend, brother to brother, lover to beloved. Gansey was home, and Ronan was a disaster, but Adam’s fear was leaking away. Ronan’s hand found Adam’s beneath the table, fingers entwining and thumb stroking comforting circles against the pulse on his wrist - he could have this, and it was going to be okay.

**Author's Note:**

> So, this one doesn't really go anywhere, I just wanted to explore the dynamics of these three wonderful boys, acknowledge the occasional awkwardness and doubt involved in a three way friendship, and lounge around in Ronan's soft, sappy love for Adam. 
> 
> I hope you like it.


End file.
